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View Full Version : Late arrivals at the Cyclists' ball...



Jon Hall
29-11-01, 14:20
Mr Barr and Ms Linkage, and their conceived out-of-wedlock children the four barr-linkages.

Jon Hall
29-11-01, 14:28
And ladies and gentlemen, coming through the door now, it's a member of the famous retailing family the Reactioncycles... yes, I do believe it's their daughter, Jane Reactioncycles

rowan (hiya every one)
29-11-01, 14:36
and the stretch cycles family and there son 'stretch' armstrong cycles

Jon Hall
29-11-01, 14:39
Oh, and here comes Flo Tairshock. She's a bit of a Fox!

Mike Beckley
29-11-01, 14:41
Who is coming through the door nowYes it's Liz Ardskin

Jon Hall
29-11-01, 14:42
And, please welcome Mr Sisjometry, who is of course accompanied by his lovely wife, Jenny Sisjometry

Cullen Ward
29-11-01, 14:42
Ladies and gentlemen: (wait for it)Penny Farthing

Dave Carlson
29-11-01, 14:43
I do believe it's Sue Perlight. I never thought she'd show up.

Colin Turner
29-11-01, 14:43
Please welcome Mr and Mrs Pump and their daughter Minnie Pump.

Fat Bear running around naked covered in jam
29-11-01, 14:44
And look, here comes a group of people with 'DNA' on their tee-shirts.....yes its the National Dyslexic Association outing..

Jon Hall
29-11-01, 14:45
Arriving now to take the thanksgiving prayer for the evening, Canon Dale Raven.

Phatboy da Silva
29-11-01, 14:45
Oh look, there's Mr Henderson and his Pink Gimp, how awfully frightfull...

Mike Beckley
29-11-01, 14:46
Announcing Mr Rock Hopper (brother of Dennis)

Mike Beckley
29-11-01, 14:48
accompanied by his companion Mr Sid Esselle

rowan (hiya every one)
29-11-01, 14:49
Ladies and gentlemen i have a shock announcement MR and Mrs shimano XT have split up so MR shimano XT has met up with Mrs shimano R so they makeMr and Mrs shimano XTRand mrs shimano XT has met up with the single Mr shimano DEORE and they make Mr and Mrs shimano DEOREXT

Jon Hall
29-11-01, 14:50
Now he's managed to work that one through, would someone like to take rowan's crowbar and put it over there, next to jacob's ladder.

Jon Hall
29-11-01, 14:53
Ladies and gentlemen, we are proud to welcome a delegation from Orange county. They are led by Mr XC and Ms Sile, and will be arriving in about four months.

Jack Ass
29-11-01, 14:53
Mr & Mrs Suspension-Fawkes....... and their daughter Judy Suspension-Fawkes

Jack Ass
29-11-01, 14:54
I just can't believe I posted THAT...

Jon Hall
29-11-01, 14:55
Aaah, here comes a girl who lives very close to this venue, Cassie Ward. She's just married a Mr Ewellty, but I'm sure many of you are already familiar with the local Cass Ewelltie-Ward.

rowan (hiya every one)
29-11-01, 14:57
what would happen if it were possible to marry Mr and Mrs shimano XTR to Mr and Mrs shimano DEOREXTA Mr,Mr and Mrs,Mrs shimano XTRDEOREXT

Phatboy da Silva
29-11-01, 14:59
Ah, here late as usual, Mr Brake, halting proceedings as always.

rowan (hiya every one)
29-11-01, 14:59
Hey every body the shimanos kids have arrived Miss and Master shimano acera-alivio

Jools ...
29-11-01, 15:01
Mr and Mrs D isc and their daughter Hope

Dr Dolittle (PhD in small furry things....!)
29-11-01, 15:02
And here come the Mini-brake family - Mr and Mrs, and there three daughters Faith, Charity and Hope Mini-brake

Cullen Ward
29-11-01, 15:02
<tries to remember if he was as excitable as Rowan at the tender age of 16>And look, that's the guy from Jack and the beenstalk. You know, the Giant

Dr Dolittle (PhD in small furry things....!)
29-11-01, 15:02
Ars* Synchronised posting.....

Phatboy da Silva
29-11-01, 15:03
Nah, you came a second before Cullen.

rowan (hiya every one)
29-11-01, 15:04
Don't worry about me i'm off got to go out tonite bye bye see you all tomorow

Phatboy da Silva
29-11-01, 15:04
First time thats ever happened to the lad, so let him have his moment of glory...

Dr Dolittle (PhD in small furry things....!)
29-11-01, 15:05
Ladies and gentlemen - I present the Rin family. Father Rin, Baby Rin and finally Ma Rin.....

Milo Bloom
29-11-01, 15:10
Mr and Mrs Bennett-Have-You-Seen-The-Height-Of-That-Drop-Off, and their nervous son, Gordon Bennett-Have-You-Seen-The-Height-Of-That-Drop-Off.

Jon Hall
29-11-01, 15:10
And we are very pleased to welcome Mr and Mrs Jey. I'm not sure who the child with them is, but I suspect it might be one of their all-day-ride loving sons. Excuse me, lad, r u an xc Jey boy?

Cullen Ward
29-11-01, 15:13
very good Jon, very good

Jon Hall
29-11-01, 15:14
Just arriving now, ladies and gentlemen, is Mrs Nertube, and her husband Ian. Actually, Ian is looking a bit deflated...

Phatboy da Silva
29-11-01, 15:15
Hmmm..May i present Mr Jesus-christ-he's-fallen flat-on-his-face and Mrs Ohhhhhhhh-bet-that-stung.

Jon Hall
29-11-01, 15:17
And coming in now, Des Ignatedbikeroute. Don't get him angry please, ladies and gentlemen. He's a complete cyclepath.

Dr Dolittle (PhD in small furry things....!)
29-11-01, 15:17
Look -Its Madge Ura and her family, Gustav, Louise, Clara, Julie and Marta....

Jon Hall
29-11-01, 15:20
Yes, Madge Ura's often a rond.

Jo Burt
29-11-01, 15:21
Welcome Mr and Mrs Railor, and their daughter Dee.

Jo Burt
29-11-01, 15:22
Who likes it in the rear(ahem)Just thought I'd say that before anyone else did.

Adam Fleming
29-11-01, 15:23
Who's that little spanish lad hanging around the door? Don't be shy mano!"Coats on... sorry..."

Milo Bloom
29-11-01, 15:25
Mr and Mrs Tomicallydesignedsaddle, and their comfortably built daughter, Anna Tomicallydesignedsaddle.No one could call her a pain in the arse.

Jon Hall
29-11-01, 15:25
Mr and Mrs Glance-at-MBUK-in-Smiths-to-read-Mint-without-having-to-buy-the-thing, and their son Sylvester, otherwise known as Sly Glance-at-MBUK-in-Smiths-to-read-Mint-without-having-to-buy-the-thing

Phatboy da Silva
29-11-01, 15:26
Introducing Mr & Mrs Dale, with there explosive young son Master Cannon Dale?Poor.

Dr Dolittle (PhD in small furry things....!)
29-11-01, 15:28
Cannon Dale? I hear he's a bit of a Bad Boy.....

Cullen Ward
29-11-01, 15:29
Mr and Mrs Catcher with their son, Crud. Did you hear about their *trouble*? Yes, the Cruds have to have protection wherever they go. Look, there's the Crud Guard

Jon Hall
29-11-01, 15:31
Here come Mr and Mrs Lock, and their robust daughter Dee.

Milo Bloom
29-11-01, 15:32
Here comes Seth Downs. He always likes to have his Way.

Dr Dolittle (PhD in small furry things....!)
29-11-01, 15:34
Here comes Chas Roberts, and if you look done a bit you will see his dog. Look down a little further and you will see his DOGS BOLX.......

Jon Hall
29-11-01, 15:35
Here come the owners of Harrods! If you've got some really nice bike stuff to sell, look no further than the classy Fayeds...

Phatboy da Silva
29-11-01, 15:36
Have you heard about Mr bottle? Apparantly he went crazy, and now he lives in a cage.Pi** poor, i know.

Milo Bloom
29-11-01, 15:37
Thats Ed Sett, wandering into the ladies room. Looks like he's lost his bearings.

Jon Hall
29-11-01, 15:37
Hehehe Milo.

Dr Dolittle (PhD in small furry things....!)
29-11-01, 15:38
Here comes a close relative of Mr Bottle, Mr Bak. And following him his lovely wife Carmel

Dr Dolittle (PhD in small furry things....!)
29-11-01, 15:38
She's just nipping off to the loo to empty her bladder....

Jon Hall
29-11-01, 15:40
Just don't mention her bite-and-suck technique.

Phatboy da Silva
29-11-01, 15:41
I hear her valve likes a big bite.

Dr Dolittle (PhD in small furry things....!)
29-11-01, 15:42
I hear she has a big opening for easy filling........

Mike Beckley
29-11-01, 15:43
Kay Bull, she's a wirey girl

Mike Beckley
29-11-01, 15:44
finished off with nipples of aluminium

Milo Bloom
29-11-01, 15:46
I thought I saw Pam Aracer, a moment ago. Oh, she's just popped out for a Smoke.

Mike Beckley
29-11-01, 15:46
I heard she was a pro

Adam Fleming
29-11-01, 15:47
Bugger, milo beat me to it... Ah well, here's Connie Tinental - she looks a little tyred...

Milo Bloom
29-11-01, 15:48
Congratulations to Mr and Mrs Uminium, whose son has just qualified as a pilot.And here he is, aircraft grade Al Uminium!

Jon Hall
29-11-01, 15:51
He's joined the airforce, you know. They're already using him in bombers.

Mike Beckley
29-11-01, 15:54
isn't his mum called Ma Zochi

Milo Bloom
29-11-01, 15:55
I hope he doesn't overdo it. I'd hate to see the fatigue brak him.

Milo Bloom
29-11-01, 15:55
..or even break him.

Jon Hall
29-11-01, 15:56
Mar Zochi couldn't be here. She's very tired these days, and tends to Drop Off.

Jo Burt
29-11-01, 15:56
The lead singer of Jefferson Airplane and her new husband Mr Rocktrail.Ladies and gentlemen.....Mrs Grace Slick-Rocktrail.

Jon Hall
29-11-01, 15:59
Here to provide the high-volume, low-budget catering are Hal Fords, Sarah Cen and their new companion, G. Tee.

Jon Hall
29-11-01, 16:01
And arriving just in time for me to get my coat and head to the pub for a pre-football birthday drink:It's Mr Raleigh, and his great big shiny chopper.

Phatboy da Silva
29-11-01, 16:03
Mr Hall, click

Will Randell
29-11-01, 19:23
And just arriving are Mr and Mrs Isized and thier very Special son, Specilizedpoor speeling

Paul Bainbridge
29-11-01, 20:04
I suppose it's nearly christmas so here's SANTA Cruz followed by that much loved pioneer of the Flex-stem Prof. Lex.

Barry B
29-11-01, 20:18
Coming in late just as everyone is leaving, Mr and Mrs axle, and just bolting thru now on her way to the toilet is mil, who is 20 today.

Barry B
29-11-01, 20:19
Getting to her destination she is glad of a quick release.

Fat Bear running around naked covered in jam
30-11-01, 07:52
Please welcome Mr & Mrs Roid. Mr Pola Roid is looking very snappy today, and of course Emma Roid is often found close to cyclists balls. In fact she can be a bit of a pain in the arse!

Oxygen Thief
30-11-01, 09:30
Oh look, a welcome arrival, it's the German Family Strap and their son HelmutBest I could think of sorry

Dylan Lang
30-11-01, 09:36
Some high powered people here:Ladies and gentlemen, Mr Dick Chainey

Milo Bloom
30-11-01, 09:49
It's Mr and Mrs Bricant and their surgically enhanced daughter Louise, or silicon-based Lou Bricant, to her friends.

rowan (hiya every one)
30-11-01, 10:26
ladies and gentelmen the DARK ANGEL he's a bit tired at the minute as he works twenty four seven

rowan (hiya every one)
30-11-01, 10:39
Oh my good ghod sara-cen has just gone into a 'frenzy'against des ignatedbikerroute( who is a cyclepath), which is a bit 'x-cess'ive of her she usally 'x-cell's in every thing, she may be sent into 'x-ile' for this des may need to go to hospital for this he may need an 'x-ray'.

Oxygen Thief
30-11-01, 10:41
time to get your coat rowan

Tim Beresford
30-11-01, 11:07
Just sneaking in through the back door, there's Dr Jekyll. No many people know his identity. Although there are rumours about him and Mr Andale's son, Cane.And here's Mr Mountain and his son Slyvester. His friends call him Rocky.

rowan (hiya every one)
30-11-01, 11:07
no time to go 'awol' t hee hee or i could go and create 'havoc'

Mike Davis
30-11-01, 11:08
Welcome please Mr and Mrs Meck and their delightful daughters Fran and Rhea.

Mike Davis
30-11-01, 11:09
And of course how marvellous to see the Fawcett-Headtubes and their niece Rhiannon.<cringe>

Tim Beresford
30-11-01, 11:23
Mr and Mrs Fisherand their son, Dave

Cullen Ward
30-11-01, 11:24
Please charge your glasses to Mr Cruz who's come dressed as Santa

Tim Beresford
30-11-01, 11:27
Ladies and Gentlemen, Mr and Mrs Athlon, and their French son, Dec.

Jon Hall
30-11-01, 11:28
And here's a guest from the Highways Agency. His job is to put out the markings for roadworks... he is of course a Kona.

Colin Turner
30-11-01, 11:31
In his wheelchair after that nasty accident accompanied by his parents Mr & Mrs Riding-along is their son Justin.

Mike Davis
30-11-01, 11:38
From the touring contingent, here's Pam Ears and her companion Han De La Barbag.Mike.

Cullen Ward
30-11-01, 11:46
'Ello, what's going on here, gate crashers. Someone call the bouncers, Rock and Shox

Jack Ass
30-11-01, 11:49
But watch out - here's that girl that always makes you ejaculate prematurely. Ah, too late! Sonja Legg.

Mike Davis
30-11-01, 12:16
Please stand for the newly-ennobled Duke Ecksey. And of course his daughter Judith. And son Sidney. And adopted Oriental son Mars Ocki Em. All together making up the Ecksey Four. I hope.

Phatboy da Silva
30-11-01, 12:44
3 cheers for Mr & Mrs Key. That Allen, he's such a tight wod.

Alec MacHenry
30-11-01, 12:49
Here come the singlespeed contingent from Todmordon, I'm afraid they're nothing but a bunch of gimps and inbreds.Now here comes a popular chap Ray S'Guard.

Ian 'speech marks are more stylish' Brixey
30-11-01, 13:28
Arriving now the bon-bars family with their son Carl in a nice woven number.

Mike Davis
30-11-01, 13:40
Closely followed by their cousins the Sur-Bars and their very relaxed son Ray.

Shawn the marmoat
30-11-01, 13:47
anyone seen Mitch Elin yet?

Milo Bloom
30-11-01, 13:50
Is that Mr & Mrs d'Ou-Toutrec's son Sol?Or is it Keith Bontrager?...or Gary Klein?...or Gary Fisher? It's so hard to tell, sometimes...

Shawn the marmoat
30-11-01, 13:53
Gary Turner?

Jon Hall
30-11-01, 14:56
Please welcome the famous producer of grip adhesive, all the way from Germany, it's Herr Spray.

Jon Hall
30-11-01, 14:58
And he's brought a female companion with him, a well known manufacturer of hydraulic fluid - it's Dot Five.

Shawn the marmoat
30-11-01, 14:59
and his emeny all the way from the streets of harlem, its the Notorious O.D.I.

Jon Hall
30-11-01, 15:18
Two Stone Roses rhythm section impersonators, Manny and his good friend Manny Two.

Mike Davis
30-11-01, 15:28
Just in time for winter, here's Walter Prufejack-Ett and his companion Thelma L Gluff. Closely followed by C L Skinz. And Baz Layah.

Milo Bloom
30-11-01, 15:51
And here comes Mike Davis. He seems to be getting his coat..

Jo Burt
30-11-01, 15:59
Oooooh, easy now lads.Here's Ms Speed.Still very single and desperate.But I doubt she'll pull tonight, not with that nasty Spot she's got.

Milo Bloom
30-11-01, 15:59
Here's Mr & Mrs Spension-Seatpost, and their daughter Sue. She has her Uses.

Milo Bloom
30-11-01, 16:01
And here's Mike Davis again. And he's very thoughtfully brought my coat too..

Jon Hall
30-11-01, 16:25
Watch out for that Sue Spension-Seatpost. She has a short temper. At a previous event, she snapped completely, and it caused a very messy exit.

Milo Bloom
30-11-01, 16:30
I remember it well Jon. She just became a complete pain the @rse.

Alec MacHenry
30-11-01, 16:46
Manomano that was bad.Ah, that great Italian family the Zocchis have bounded in led by the spritely Ma Zocchi.

Jon Hall
30-11-01, 16:49
Over there in the corner Sid and Judy appear to be getting rather close. Careful, Sid, Judy's on the rebound.

Milo Bloom
30-11-01, 16:54
She's been under a lot of pressure lately..

Milo Bloom
30-11-01, 16:55
..it was all a bit of a shock..

Jon Hall
30-11-01, 16:56
But she's really pumped up tonight.

Jon Hall
30-11-01, 16:56
Mind you, if Sid's hand goes any lower, she might start damping.Ooh, is that my coat?

Milo Bloom
30-11-01, 16:56
So brace yourself.

Milo Bloom
30-11-01, 16:59
Here comes Stan Chion to give Judy some support.

Jon Hall
30-11-01, 17:11
Here's the world's slowest gardener. He's always th elastomer the lawn.

Milo Bloom
30-11-01, 17:23
You're going to need a bigger coat, Jon ;-)

Paul Bainbridge
30-11-01, 17:29
Has anyone mentioned Bob Cattrail yet?

Milo Bloom
30-11-01, 17:32
Coming in now, it's Bes Pokeframe, and her cuz, Tom Paintjob.I'll get me powder-coat...

Mike Davis
30-11-01, 17:32
And while I've got one arm in my coat, here's the Rertoobs and their son Steven. Ste to his friends, naturally enough.And the L'Springs who've inexplicably named their daughter after a fish. Koi.Mike.

Paul Bainbridge
30-11-01, 18:16
Quickly followed by Scott Octane and his friend Cameron Elbak, but you can call him CamTaxi!Oh heres Simon Low now aswell, but you can call him Si.

Alec MacHenry
30-11-01, 18:30
At last the Buh's who've brought along their very adaptable nephew, the multi-purpose Lou Buh.

Paul Bainbridge
30-11-01, 19:01
Please be up standing for Mr S.P Dee

tom lovelock
30-11-01, 21:39
bah dum tish

Paul Bainbridge
30-11-01, 21:57
scraping the bottom of the barrel Im afraid